By shelz.
On April 17, 1961 a group of Cuban exiles trained and backed by the USA invaded Cuba with the intent of overthrowing Fidel Castro’s government. The troops that landed at the Bay of Pigs on that morning carried with them the hopes of the United States government that the red white and blue would whoop some Cuban tail and make it possible for a leader with a love for all things American to be inserted. Three days later, the Cuban expatriates who could limp back, did; with their tales between their legs and defeat in their hearts. Fidel wasn’t having it.
The failed mission is one of the most famous military blunders of all time. Plenty of folks lost their jobs, some lost their lives and hindsight has taught us it was a bad idea from jump. But the military isn’t the only industry that experiences failure on this level.
The music industry has also seen its share of good ideas gone bad; things that seemed to make sense until they…well…didn’t. So on the 50th anniversary of one of the worst mistakes this country has ever made we are going to take a look at idea flops, Hip-Hop style.
1. Pretending To Be Gangsta, While Secretly Knowing How To Use A Metronome
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It worked for plenty of men before Rick Ross. We knew Eazy E was the only person in NWA that may have lived a portion of what he spit. We knew Dre was formerly a fro mullet wearing disco rap guy, but we let them and countless other rappers sing it even though they didn’t live it. But that all came to a screeching halt with Boss. Her style was wild and belligerent; a drug-crazed psycho killer bitch who didn’t give a fuck about none of y’all. It worked until the Hip-Hop reality police stepped in and set her on her ass because she once took piano lessons and went to private school. She hasn’t really been seen since.
2. Leaving One Music Black Hole For Another
Jay Electronica – Shiny Suit Theory
Jay Electronica decided Diddy wasn’t the way to go and meandered over to Jigga’s neighborhood in his search for a musical home. I couldn’t be mad at him. Diddy is known for relegating some of his artists to a weird alternate universe where albums never drop, but Shawn Carter rents space there. Ask Santigold. Maybe if Jay Elect had some hair to whip back and forth the process wouldn’t take so long. I hope I’m wrong about this, but I don’t think I am.
3. Twitter
Fabolous – Look At Her Killin Em Part 2
It is addictive for plenty, but if it keeps you from doing your job you might want to seek therapy. There are plenty of rappers whose timelines are way more happening than their discographies and that simply shouldn’t be the case. Also, stop saying dumb shit in the heat of the moment. With Twitter journalism at an all time high, your dumb shit tweet has been posted to about 83 different sites by the time you delete it.
4. Buying Something Sight (Or Sound) Unseen
When people get out of prison, it’s very easy to forget the years between the day they walked in and the day they walked out. And I think that’s exactly what happened to L.A. Reid when he snapped up Shyne days after he was released. But the man who went in sounding like Biggie’s heir apparent came out sounding like Lloyd Banks’ asthmatic doppelganger and Def Jam (after already dropping Shyne from the roster once back in 2005) was kind of stuck with him.
5. Trusting 50 Cent With Your Sensitive Side
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When extra personal stuff hits the net, I balk. I didn’t want to read Kwame Kilpatrick or Tiger Woods’ naughty texts. I don’t want to see a Lil John or a Paris Hilton sex tape. But there was something kind of mesmerizing about Young Buck’s teary-eyed conversation with 50 Cent about his financial woes and impending removal from G-Unit. I think that taped phone conversation proved that Buck wasn’t as hard as we once thought and 50 was more ruthless than we ever imagined. Even using Rick Ross disgruntled baby momma to embarrass both him and her paled in comparison. Buck, you have my sympathy.
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