By Gabe Mendoza
I’m 3 years in to a lifetime responsibility as the father of my incredible son. My wife and I get lots of compliments about his behavior and contagious laugh from our family and friends and I’d like to think we’re doing okay as first time parents. With that said, every day going forward I ponder, “What can I do to not screw up my son?”
There are so many ways adults can do harm to a child’s character both emotionally and physically, so I often catch myself thinking of what I should or shouldn’t do because I will not be THAT parent. You already know.
As a contributor and reporter of this wonderful Hip-Hop culture, I like many parents, want my child to like the same things I do. Lately, I have been pondering when I should introduce my son to Hip-Hop. We keep the radio on an urban station during travel to satisfy my Hip-Hop jones, and from his bouncing and head-nodding, I can tell HE REALLY LIKES IT! Now that I know that much, what is the next step?
Is it too early to introduce him to Mos Def And Talib Kweli Sre Black Star? Can I begin to play Dilla’s Donuts at nap time? I want him to get a nice smooth introduction in to the good stuff. With all things involving children, timing is key. Put them on the playing field too early they might get hurt; nurture them too long they become too dependent. The balancing act that comes with being a parent is unlike anything else you will do in life. A balancing act that is a full time job.
I would rather not have my son going to daycare dropping f-bombs from something he heard me play. As such, I never play anything but Soul records openly in our home. The harder Hip-Hop is shelved until my son turns a responsible age like 15. Okay 31. So as I listen to record after record, the content has grown rife with anger and less important about making a cool, vibing song. I get it, not many artists are trying to rein in 2 to 3-year-olds. What about when my son gets 10? Is that also still too young for an adult Hip-Hop song?
Most of today’s rap is not designed for young listeners. Hell, sometimes I wonder if I’m old enough. The danger of the music has been written about all too frequently, and everybody wants their child to have a childhood of smiles and laughs. So here I am aching for my son to be a part of something I’m so passionate about, but maybe he’s just too young.
Truth be told, I was never given the guiding hand to listening to music. I was just warned never to bump the record player. I’m confident most of us grew up this way, minus the turntable instructions, out there on our own to discover what the world had to offer, courtesy of MTV, BET and The Box (Music YOU control). So when I bought The Chronic on tape, it was a choice I made, but for an 11 or 12 year old, the decision even by today’s is a questionable one.
I spent most of my youth listening to gangster rap albums and understood that the lifestyle vocalized on the West Coast although true for them, was something of a fantasy to me. I didn’t live in Compton, I didn’t tote guns to school and I didn’t sell drugs to make it out the hood, but thankfully I could decipher the two worlds. However, some people can take the words of rappers much too literal and that scares the hell out of parents everywhere. Including this one right here.
My parents played soft rock from the 70’s, 80’s R & B and Motown every Saturday and Sunday morning while growing up, so I have this eclectic sense of music I take pride in. Don’t you ever talk bad about Boston the band! I too want my son to have those same experiences and if he chooses a different genre from mine to like that’s cool, but liking what I like would be even cooler. I suppose tying my love for Hip Hop music and my son together is a way to form a tighter bond, but as I learned, life is much more than beats and rhymes. For now, I’ll put back Common’s Resurrection and continue listening to that worn out CD of Yo Gabba Gabba, I mean that’s kind of a introduction to Hip-Hop right? So here I am worrying, when there’s nothing to worry about. Such a parent thing to do.
