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THIS. IS. SPARTAAA! And Sparta Sucks Aka Week 3 In The NFL

By shelz.

It’s not that the NFL has in years past been a wholesome bastion of sportsmanship and good manners, but the players and their coaches are taking field cage match to new heights. And the bottom line is you can’t blame that on the refs. Commentators say the replacements should get in there and shut the unnecessary roughness down before games get out of hand. But I’m not sure if anyone has suggested these players and their organizations police themselves. I mean, they are adults and all. The idea that there is an automatic recoil to a little yellow piece of material built into a players subconscious just sounds kooky.

Word of the day is chippy? Whatever. This is celebrity death match without the claymation. You might even enjoy the dark athletic violence of it all until you replay the sobering 12 minute moment that was the entirety of the Raiders medical staff meticulously strapping Darrius Heyward-Bey onto the gurney and lifting him onto the cart to take him via ambulance to the hospital after Ryan Mundy laid a hit on the defenseless receiver so hard it probably rattled Al Davis in his crypt.

This is coming from a Ravens fan. So you know I’m down for a little measured Sunday brutality, but this isn’t healthy. Nor is it fun to watch. Do better NFL.

Oh and can we please move on from the Golden Tate touchdown. He didn’t catch the ball. He knows it. We know it. What everyone should be talking about is that beastly D Seattle fielded and how everyone should be afraid, very afraid.

Bill Belichick channeled Lil Scrappy and put them paws on a referee. Below is the footage. He really just tried to get dudes attention, but the bottom line is if the coach taps a shoulder, his players might think it’s okay to tap his jaw.

Damn Matt Schaub. Just damn. The headlines say that man donated his earlobe to the cause. It reminds me of that airline commercial with Matt Ryan where the kid seated next to him steals all his ish then sells it on ebay while Ryan sleeps during the flight. I wonder how much Matt Schaub’s earlobe would be worth on the open market. Does anyone know if he found it. Mays going all Mike Tyson on dude was just dirty and he really should be fined. And someone needs to check the Bengals concussion check procedures because they are lightening fast.

One more thing. These players chastising the Seahawks for accepting their win on Monday is nonsense. I’d like to see one of these dudes win under similar circumstances and then stand at a press conference and say, “We don’t want that W. Take it back. We don’t deserve it. Thanks.” GTFOHWTBS and have a good day.

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