By shelz.

Now that everyone has seen and gasped at (or rewinded) Erykah Badu’s naked romp through Texas and acted like it was the first time they ever saw some cakes without frosting, (Unfortunately for some of those children out that day, it was the first time they saw that.) let’s take a breather from all the “artistic movement vs. publicity stunt” debate and realize she isn’t the first celeb to go ass out for a little attention. Hell, it’s hard to catch some of these folks WITH clothes on.  Sometimes the pictures or video are taken specifically for mass consumption and other times they are taken as personal mementos and then released by mistake on purpose. Whatever the true reason they always get the fans talking. 

Vanessa Williams  

Before she was a singer/actor, he was the first black Miss America.  She was beautiful, talented, regal homegrown goodness; everything a young lady representing the stars and stripes was supposed to be.  However, after Bob Guccione got his hands on some steamy girl on girl shots she took prior to the competition and spread them all over Penthouse; it appeared Miss Williams was better suited to reppin stars and strap-on’s and was immediately stripped of her crown.

Thankfully Ms. Williams actually had enough talent that this was a small bump on the road to mega stardom.  Some of the people on this list…not so lucky.

[pro-player width=’425′ height=’344′ type=’video’]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwBmoNXrr0w&feature=player_embedded[/pro-player]

Janet Jackson

When you are famous you can’t be naked anywhere without risking some stalkerazzi guy catching you on film.  Just ask Janet Jackson.  In the back yard, minding her business, trying to get that line-less tan and she got… got.  The video actually didn’t go too far. I guess her legal team was pretty aggressive in handling it, but of course there were a few wise lil Penny connoisseurs who managed to snap that up as soon as it appeared, adding yet another layer to their JJ archive. Why look at one tata when you can see the whole thing?

Eve

Your past is exactly that and there are plenty of things buried there that I’m sure you wish never happened.  However, those events helped form the awesomeness that is you today.  I guess that is the way that Eve had to look at her nakey pic mess when those shots of her at the strip club showed up on the net.  Not only was she at the strip club, she was working.  And not only was she working, she had her own personal muff diver umm… diving.  And what was Eve’s public response to all the chatter about it?  Yes that’s me and what?     Hahaaa.. Fist pump for you Miss Eve.

Levi Johnston

I guess if you don’t have a diploma or a solid plan on how you are going to provide for your child who is also the grandchild of a presidential candidate; you have to explore all options.  However, if the best one is dropping trow for Playgirl, then the future doesn’t look all that great.  And from what I understand, since I never looked at the pics, neither does his center fold.  Good luck Bristol girl, good luck.

Adrienne Bailon

Who you say?  The Cheetah Girl, I respond.  Did she do it on purpose?  Was she hacked?  Who knows?  She took the pics herself obviously and they were supposed to be for that special someone, but they ended up being for millions of special someone’s and some not so special folks too.  Anyway, even though on the scandal scale these pictures weren’t that bad, Disney still canned her as well as the other two Cheetah Girls because Mickey don’t play that.

Big Daddy Kane

These were professional shots for a professional coffee table book being produced by Madonna during her extra professional sex-fiend phase.  And the set up of the picture (him, Madonna, Naomi Campbell in a simulated sexual position) may possibly be some men’s not so secret fantasy.  However, the response to it and his subsequent spread for Playgirl weren’t accepted all that well.  Maybe back then it wasn’t cool for a rapper to take it all off.  We sure don’t complain now.  I guess Kane was just ahead of his time.

Aaron Reid

It’s pretty obvious LA Reid’s son wasn’t even aware that his naked pic was being taken since he was, per the photographer, knocked out from 10 minutes of nookie.  It’s also obvious that this girl was pretty pissy about being told a story of the ecstasy he could produce and then getting back to the room and seeing what he was really working with.  So in a moment of anger and haste she snapped the picture capturing Aaron Jr. in all his lil glory and leaked it to the net.  Everybody can’t be holding 10.  I’m sure he has talents in other areas.  Bless his heart.

Trina

She called the cops.  She called the FBI.  Maybe even the Army, Navy and the Marines.  Her phone was stolen, her pics were leaked and then the thief tried to blackmail her for the rest of the contents of the phone?  You mean there was more? So the drama has come and gone (including an almost unintelligible response from Khia), but the pics still remain.  She said she was very upset about it all, but she also said:

A good stroke in and a good stroke out; that’s what I’m all about.

John Wayne Bobbit

What’s the best career path to take after your wife hacks your weiner off?  How do you extend those 15 minutes of infamy?  You cater to everyone’s morbid curiosity and show off your re-attached appendage, for a fee of course. Bobbit starred in two adult films; the ironically titled Uncut and something like Bobbit’s Frankenpenis (I kid you not) I’m not quite sure why you would pay to see it when you can google the court photos and see his severed thang-thang laying on a stretcher by itself for free. J

Vanessa Hudgens

She was in an amazing space in her career.  At only 18, she was the star of Disney’s most popular production ever, High School Musical.  She was winning awards, dancing, dropping albums, touring and just generally being America’s sweetheart.  Then she sent some naughty pics to her boyfriend and they ended up where?  On the internet.  Mickey didn’t fire her though. Guess she was a little more important than that Cheetah Girl. Since then .. loooots of other naked pics have popped up.  Guess she has a habit.

Jamie Foxx

The cellie in the mirror pic.. sigh. He didn’t look bad at all, but his bathroom did.  Note to naked self photography junkies who are addicted to the bathroom; please tidy up before you go to snappin the shutter.  Anyway, Foxx said the pic had something to do with a role he was preparing for (suuure) and sicked his lawyer on folks who posted him in all his bukkey nekkid beauty.  Funny thing is .. I kept wondering what that picture would have looked like if he had the Wanda wig and jewelry on.  Does that make me weird?

Prince William

Yes, Charles and Diana’s oldest.  The Queen of England’s grandson was playing soccer or rugby or polo or something brit shi shi when he decided:

A: he had to pee pee

B the potty was way to far away.

C: That no one would see him pissing by a fence in the open.

Well, he was wrong.  One person saw him and that person had a camera.  The royal peen was everywhere.  Sigh… Considering how long the Queen has been around, chances are hes not going to be King for a long time. Hopefully, everyone will have forgotten by then.

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