By G.I.N.A. (Game Is Not Allowed)

I have an issue.  It is a problem not many of us are willing to admit.  Society frowns on it, but I’m not ashamed.  Maybe there is help for people like me. They say the first step is admitting you have a problem; hi, my name is G.I.N.A and I have road rage.

There are thousands maybe even millions of drivers everywhere who suffer from this affliction.  I am not here to talk numbers but to offer insight on why those of us with road rage are who we are.  If you are reading this and shaking your head in disbelief, the cause of our rage could be you.  Yes you, the 40 mph driver in a 55 mph zone, riding in the left lane!  You, the holder of the cell phone (who can’t be bothered with an earpiece) in a “hands free” state. This person probably wouldn’t be so irritating if they had the skill to hold the phone and drive above 30 mph; they are already breaking one law yet have the presence of mind not to speed. Driving below the speed limit is an offense also genius!  Let us not forget the scary driver.  These drivers insist on riding their breaks with no car ahead of them, already going slow in the fast lane but every few yards they have to hit the breaks for no apparent reason.  These are the drivers who incite our rage.

My biggest pet peeve is the women who decide to wait until A.M. rush hour to apply a full face of makeup.  We aren’t talking about a swipe of gloss across the lips.  I’ve been stuck behind ladies applying the entire cosmetics counter while driving slow-in the left lane!  What’s humorous is how brazen these chicks are with their antics.  I sometimes wonder if there is a hidden camera somewhere and I will get cash based on the length of time I can keep my cool.  Where are the troopers when stupidity like this is happening?  Those flashing red and blues will appear out of nowhere to get your ass for a broken tail light, but where the hell are they America’s Next Flop Model stalls an entire lane of traffic playing dress up?

Then there are the elderly.  I have much respect for the men and women who came before me.  I admire the fact that many older people still have the strength and tenacity to battle traffic in the concrete jungle.  Honestly though, a few of them should have their licenses revoked and be given bus passes.  I’m sorry gramps but you know the left lane (even the middle lane) is not for you.  Those wonderful rectangular black and white road signs (“slower moving traffic keep right”) were developed especially for you.  As a matter of fact the right lane was probably made just for independent elders.   We want you to drive, just stay out of our way.

Certainly some people take it too far.  No one should ever loose their life over this.  All jokes aside, it is truly not that serious.  Worst case scenario is we “ragers” arrive at our destination a few minutes late.  Truth be told many of us are in a race to go nowhere (like those drivers who speed up and cut you off just to get to a red light…great).  Being from a big city can be fun, driving in one however isn’t. We contend with school and city buses, road work, cab drivers, dart and dash pedestrians (you know the ones who try make it across the street before they become a hood ornament) and my nemesis; red lights (which is why I prefer the highway to city streets).

Everyone is not built for highway driving just as most folks shouldn’t be allowed to sit behind the wheel of a car let alone drive one.  Yet every day we set out on our various congested roadways and have to battle each other.  How are some people given licenses to drive? I’m sure there must be some under the table agreements made because I’ve seen things that should make the DMV ashamed.  Alas, this is the world we drive in.  Road raggers are people too; people who need to learn patience maybe but the blame can’t rest solely on our steering wheel.  Maybe the rest of the world should learn some driving skill (or etiquette) and those of us with road rage should learn tolerance.  Of course the list of offenders is much longer than what I have time and space for here.   We all know our roles, the offenders and the raggers, but we can all drive along peacefully as long as you stay out of the left lane and keep your slow moving vehicles to the right

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