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Thread: Jack Roller, tell us a story

  1. #111
    Gold Jack Roller knows his shit! Jack Roller's Avatar
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    Hm. The first time I bought a mask was in the army when I went on a trip to Cleveland. I had always liked lucha libre wrestlers in WCW. I bought it for the hell of it. Then on a trip to Oberlin (a university that's super liberal and crawling with weirdos) my army buddy Chis wears this mask to a university picnic. The mask is crazy looking and it's pink and gold. We start playing frisby and he's running his ass off making diving catches like frisby is the most important thing in his life. Then he'd jump up and throw it while screaming. Everyone thought he was mentally handicapped. It was hard not to laugh. Because everyone was watching at this picnic thought he was retarded so they were trying to be polite and they were all biting their tongues but couldn't look away. Then Chris would jump for the frisby, catch it and do a somersault before he flipped it way off course into a bunch of people screaming "WHOOOOO!" A few proper looking old people would snicker despite feeling sorry for him and fuck, that was hilarious.

    Anyways, I gave it to this Mexican dude named Castrejon, and he took the mask one day to California and gave it to his kid. So that was the end of it for a while.

    Then I decided I would be one for Halloween at the call center I worked at. That was uneventful.

    I guess the night I really got into it was Cinco de Mayo in 2007. My friend James pretty much dared me to wear a mask. It didn't take much daring. I got a good buzz on with some Dos Equis and I walked with my friend James and Jay to The Pub. The bar wasn't too crowded but there were enough people. And wearing the mask I felt a bit self-conscious so I drank more. I got really shitfaced. As the night went on it got more crowded and people were getting more to drink and wanted to ask what the fuck my deal was. I started shit talking everyone. And I'd been going to this bar since 2002 so I felt like I could get away with quite a bit. Girls were taking their picture with me and guys were yelling shit. And I was acting like an ass. There was this cute bartender there that night. She had nerdy glasses and a big ass. She was so hot without even trying to be. She knew me and thought it was be a good idea gave me a small bat (what the fuck?) and a couple of piņatas. I started throwing them up and wailing on them so she ran back behind the bar. Then I had a thought. The place next door was owned by the same guy. More piņatas to smash. So I run outside to go over there and the bartender chases after me and grabs the bat back. I should have told her my plan I guess.

    So I go back in and obviously I have no impulse control left. I'm walking by the broken piņatas and see this cute blonded bent over in front of me picking up candy. So instead of wondering if my next idea is a good one or not, I make sure my friends are looking. Then I grab this piņata that was made to look like a Corona bottle, rip the top off, and shoot candy all over this girls back like I just pulled out of her ass to come on her. I'm jacking this bottle of candy off onto this poor girl and I can't stop fucking laughing. My friends looked like they were going to die. I'm sure I did other shit that night but that part clouds over everything. And after that night it was all the workers in the bar could talk about. So I did it again. It was always a great time.

    One night I loaned a mask to Jersey Joe. He said later kind of the same thing I said. He felt the need to drink more than usual. Then he said he felt some anonymity that made him want to do stupid shit. That he felt like he had the Venom symbiote on. That's not too far off I think.
    Last edited by Jack Roller; 12-25-2011 at 10:02 AM.

  2. #112
    Administrator Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom rivals Doom in infinite awesomeness Dr Doom's Avatar
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    So basically it's like the mask from The Mask, lol.

  3. #113
    Gold Jack Roller knows his shit! Jack Roller's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr Doom View Post
    So basically it's like the mask from The Mask, lol.
    Basically. One time I was knocking on a girl's dorm room window with it on. The bar had closed and I knew she was easy. A cop stopped me, asked what I was doing. I explained I knew the girl. Then he asked for my ID and said some shit in his radio. He never asked me to take my mask off which I thought was odd. Luckily that story never got around the dorms.
    Last edited by Jack Roller; 06-20-2012 at 12:42 PM.

  4. #114
    Plastic KTULU is in balance
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    Do you buy nice masks from highspots.com or is it some dollar store shit? I think I need to get a La Parka mask and try this shit.

  5. #115
    Plastic KTULU is in balance
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    http://www.highspots.com/wrestling-m...datenew&page=1

    lookit all dat shit

    tiger mask mask goes hard

  6. #116
    Gold Jack Roller knows his shit! Jack Roller's Avatar
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    corazonfairtrade.com

    maskmaniac.com

    elucha.com

    maskedwrestlers.com

    Pretty sure I'm forgetting one but yeah highspots is one. I wanted to get a custom made one on highspots but can never settle on a design.
    Last edited by Jack Roller; 12-27-2011 at 01:16 AM.

  7. #117
    Gold Jack Roller knows his shit! Jack Roller's Avatar
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    And yeah, tiger mask is amazing.

  8. #118
    Cardboard Oseru has breakout potential
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    The masks are great. Chicks will make out with you for talking like Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. The drinking too much thing is definitely true.

  9. #119
    Plastic KTULU is in balance
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    thanks jack, gonna buy some of this shit

  10. #120
    Plastic KTULU is in balance
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    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venetian_mask

    The mask would permit the wearer to act more freely in cases where he or she wanted to interact with other members of the society outside the bounds of identity and everyday convention. It was useful for a variety of purposes, some of them illicit or criminal

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