“Don’t talk about my baby mama!” How many times have we heard that phrase in passing or even in direct conversation with people when that particular relation arises? Never mind that you just finished listening to Captain Savem rail endlessly about how baby mama is beating him over the head for child support or they are supposedly so trifling…yet he can never seem to get rid of her.
The baby mama has taken on greater significance in the age of the single parent ; It has become more the staple than the exception, to the point where it’s nestling its way into traditional, actual relations like wife, sister, mother and so on. You don’t share blood, you don’t live together and you’re always in court or fighting in the street, yet somehow when that relationship is put under duress by others, it is defended like saggy jeans, the right to bear arms and fried bologna and jelly sandwiches.
We watch shows like Love & Hip-Hop Atlanta and guys like Stevie J launch into a soliloquy about how baby momma is family; to the point where someone he’s presently dating has to take a back seat. Mind you, he’s been dealing with baby mama for 15 years and won’t marry her, but that’s another story for another time.
On the other end, we have Lil Scrappy, whose baby mama is the only person on the show with a real job. He leaves her hanging at the drop of a hat while she is foolishly following his washed up ass wherever he goes. She puts up a front like she’s finally finished, but it says a lot about a when you share a child, you’re trying to provide for said child, and dude is on some wild shit asking you to give him a break.
Much of this crap is the result of the Baby Boy syndrome, where single mothers are raising boys (By themselves. They are not the only ones at fault) and not tasking their sons with any responsibility. When the teacher sends him home with a note, it’s the teacher who doesn’t like her baby. They call their sons names like “man”, and “poppa” like they are dating but whenever it’s time for the boy to behave like a man, he’s her baby all over again. These Baby Boys grow up to be men who are perpetually on the prowl for the next woman to put up with their shit and coddle them; again in the absence of responsibility. Get her pregnant? No problem; quit his job and cut hair or work off the books so child support can’t get him…but still trying to get in her pants!
Five years and a baby or two later, when she finally snaps out of her funk and moves on with her life, these fools are still playing. She’s moved on, got a man, maybe married and Baby Boy still trying to get at her and probably doing damage to the first relationship she’s had in her life. Eventually, he’ll ruin that for her and mess up the kids’ only chance at having a respectable, responsible male role model and we’re back to square one. He’s ruined the lives of her and her kids, “But dat’s my baby mama, doe.”
People of the hood listen up. Wrap it up, make him wear a condom, and don’t have one more child with these no good savages. Give the children you already have a chance to succeed in life without the anchor of a no good baby daddy. If you are a baby daddy and you are not going to marry her, don’t lead her on and stop trying to beat. Man up and learn how to handle relationships the right way. Show her the respect you want others to have.
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